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Sex+ Questionnaire (via Laci Green) February 22, 2012

Posted by shaunphilly in Culture and Society, Polyamory, Skepticism and atheism.
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I’m just answering the questions already answered by Laci and others.

Sex+ Questionnaire For: Shaun McGonigal
Age: 34
Sex: Male
Location: Philadelphia, PA

Sexual Awakenings

1. How did you learn about sex?
I attended a very liberal Quaker school in Philadelphia, where sex-ed was pretty good.  Thus, by 5th grade I had a pretty good idea about what sex was, and in 8th grade we dealt with more advanced questions about STIs, pregnancy, etc that most people don’t learn until later (if ever).  In terms of learning how to do it well, that took practice.  Lots of practice.

2. Were you able to talk about sex with your parents?
Somewhat, but because of good education in school it was largely unnecessary.  I am pretty open now, and have been for most of my adulthood, and now my parents and I can be pretty open about jokes, discussions, etc (so long as they don’t get detailed).

3. Do you remember your first kiss?
Yes.  I was playing truth or dare.  I chose dare (and dared!).  I was about 11, maybe 12.

4. Tell us about an embarrassing moment you’ve had with sexuality/a partner/etc.
Huh…many   Getting caught several times by both parents (mine and my partners) or almost caught.  One time, while with a girl for the first time (it was her first time ever), she looked down and said “I think you’re in the wrong hole” which led to me pulling out and almost falling off the bed.  She was just messing with me (a joke to lighten her anxiety, perhaps), but I was really humiliated nonetheless.

5. How old were you when you made your sexual debut? Were you ready for it?
19, and yes I was.  I waited, passing up a couple of opportunities when I was 14 and 17 or 18, and I suppose I am glad I did.

Relationships

6. Are you in a romantic or sexual relationship?
Yes, two of them (they are both sexual and romantic)

7. Would you prefer being in a relationship or being single? Why?
There have been times when being single was necessary and preferable, but I am extraordinarily happy with my relationships currently.  The joy, opportunity for growth, and intimacy I get with my partners is irreplaceable and wonderful.

8. Would you ever consider a polyamorous relationship?
Have, and am in one.  I am engaged to be married in a few months and my girlfriend and I consider ourselves long-term partners.  Polyamory is amazing.

9. Have you ever cheated on a partner?
Unfortunately, yes.  Worse, I lied about it once.  I learned that honesty is better than not, and eventually discovered taht I can have more sex without having to sacrifice relationships.

10. What was your longest relationship? Your shortest?
Longest was about 3 years, but it was a little off and on.  Mostly on.  Shortest? What is the definition of “relationship”? Because the answer could be “an hour” or ” a couple of weeks or so.”

11. What do you look for in a partner?
Intelligence, authenticity/honesty, lack of faith (IOW, skepticism), sex-positive attitude, and somewhat nerdy/geeky personality.

12. Do you have any “deal breakers”?
Deep religious conviction or lack of intellectual curiosity.

Sexploration

13. What is your favorite way to ask for consent?
“So, I am attracted to you; would you like to have some kind of sex?”

14. What is your favorite position?
Depends.  I love a woman on top, moving how she likes and watching her enjoy herself.  I prefer to finish while on top, especially from behind.

15. Would you/have you had a one night stand?
I have, and would again under the right circumstances.

16. What’s your favorite place to be touched by a partner?
Ears, nipples, penis.

17. Is there anything that you’ve wanted to try sexually but haven’t (yet)?
Not really.  I have had the opportunity to explore fantasies, and very little is left unexplored.  I’m pretty vanilla, overall, and am comfortable with that.

18. Would you/have you had group sex (3+ people)?
I have, many times, and will again, many times.  Most so far (with full penetration, anyway) was with 5 people.  I’ve “fooled around” with around 7 other people before, as well.

19. Would you/have you practiced BDSM?
I have, a little.  i would again, but it would be pretty tame.

20. Would you/have you done role-play?
I have.  Not my cup of tea.  I have trouble pretending not to be in reality (hence the atheism)

21. What is your biggest turn on?
watching someone cum, especially if I’m helping make it happen.

22. Biggest turn off?
being messy, dirty (literally, not metaphorically), or surrounded by excessive clutter.  Scat play is right-out!

23. How often do you masturbate?
Once or twice a week.  Mostly, it’s not necessary, but sometimes it’s just what I want.

24. What do you think is the most erotic part of your body?
right ear or my penis, depending.

Self Love

25. What’s your favorite thing about yourself?
My ability to challenge myself to be better than I have been, and to overcome the struggles I have been handed.

26. What’s your biggest accomplishment in the last 3 years?
Surviving an awful relationship which brought me to Atlanta, left me abandoned, and coming out stronger than I’ve ever been.

27. Tell us one goal you have for yourself.
I want to one day actually become the person I see myself as when I’m feeling confident (some say arrogant, but whatevs…)

28. How do you take care of yourself?
By being honest with myself, opening up to people I love when I need help, and by writing.

Hot Topics

29. Do you support a woman’s right to choose an abortion if she accidentally gets pregnant?
Yes.

30. Do you think prostitution should be legal?
Yes.

31. If you had a baby boy, would you have his foreskin removed (circumcise him)?
No.

32. Should same-sex marriage be legal?
Any legal arrangement between consenting adults should be legal.  So not only should same-sex/gender marriage be legal, but so should polyamorous marriage.

33. Should comprehensive sex education be given in high schools or abstinence only?
Comprehensive, and much of it before high school.

To Infinity, and Beyond

34. What do you want to be when you grow up?
A good husband, boyfriend, and (perhaps) father.  I want to be respected (and I want to earn that respect) and look back with as few regrets as possible.

35. Do you want to get married?
I am getting married (to a wonderful woman)!

36. Do you want to have children?
Almost certainly.  The question will be whether I want to have children with more than one person or not.  Time will tell, I suppose.

37. What do you want to do for others before you die?

Help them see what they are capable of if they rid themselves of there stupid fears.  We are all capable of much, but are held back by so little.

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