I’ve decided to become a Mormon

…for Halloween.

More specifically, I am going to be one of those door-knocking missionaries.  You know what I’m talking about; white shirt, tie, name tag, some sort of bag, and literature to leave behind. Except I don’t have an proper name tag, the kind with my name and some LDS cred.  So, I had to make one.

A few years ago I had been working with Margaret Downey on some project on another (likely a tabling event, but I don’t remember), and she gave participants some badges, and I have had mine ever since.  I actually have a whole collection of such badges, from various conventions over the years, and never expected to have them come in handy.  But today as I was thinking about putting together my costume for a Halloween party tonight, and since I have decided to go for the magic underwear angle (no, I’m not wearing that), I glanced over to the door-knob from which such badges hang from their lanyards and a smile crept along the side of my face.

I have a background in art.  I actually attended a summer art class at Moore College of Art after my 8th grade year, due to winning an art competition at the school I attended (Friends Select, if you care) which landed me a scholarship for a summer program, primarily for painting.  So, when it comes to having to use artistic talents, I have something from which to draw.

Evidence of an hour's work

But, having only white paper, no printer, and various pens, markers, etc around, I was left with a problem since I would need a badge with white lettering on a black background.  I knew what I had to do, but it was just going to take some patience.

To start, I had to measure the size of the paper, map out the lettering plan on a grid (penciled in lightly), based upon an image of a real missionary ID badge which I had googled and left on my primary computer screen.  Then, once the letters were penciled, I very carefully traced the outside of the letters with a black pen, then filled in the rest of the background with two sharpies.  The results, among the tolls used, are to the left.

After that, it was a simple matter of sliding the paper in the plastic holder, covering the phrase “Proud to be an Atheist in America” but leaving the name above it in place.  The result can be seen to the right.

But that could not be all! Why? Well, every time I have seen those missionaries I have seen them carrying some sort of bag, backpack or messenger bag usually.  And I have a messenger bag.  Except it has the Dawkins scarlet ‘A’ on it, and that is no bag a Mormon missionary would carry, now is it?

So, I googled Mormon images, found a simple picture of the angel Moroni blowing his horn, and taped a piece of white paper to the screen to trace it (the juxtaposition of technology and Luddite technique does tickle me a bit).  Then I filled it in with the same markers and, after doing so, I used some clear packing tape to affix the paper over the ‘A’ on my bag and, well, voila!

That, with my copy of the Book of Mormon in hand, allows me to transform into Mormon missionary man!

And with it all put together, it all looks like this. So, happy Halloween everyone.


4 thoughts on “I’ve decided to become a Mormon

  1. Great costume! You could probably gain entrance to the “Tabernacle” in Salt Lake City!

  2. Yes bigotry is great, creative, and hilarious. That goes without saying. If only the occupy Philly morons had such an easily distinguishable cliche rather than something requiring intelligence depth and insight to mock, you would surely rise above the minimally mediocre.—-Happy Halloween!!!

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