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In the Beginning… February 12, 2009

Posted by shaunphilly in religion, atheism, polyamory, culture.

So, I have a lot to say.  Why?  Well, when you are nudged into the corners of culture from different angles, you see culture from a different perspective, and thus pick up on things that others tend not to see.  That is, when you look on belief in god, monogamy, and other so-called normal things as strange behavior patterns (and are not shy about it), you begin to feel the cold shoulder of people, even so-called open-minded people, whose beliefs and values are challenged by your views.

That said, perhaps I should define these words; atheist and polyamorous.

I’m an atheist.  And despite what you’ll hear from disingenuous and dishonest commentators, apologists and other assorted ignoramuses, this does not mean that I’m afraid of gods, ignoring god to live a life of sin, nor am I claiming that I know gods don’t exist.  It simply means that I have not yet seen sufficient evidence to compel belief in gods–any gods I’ve heard of–and so I lack belief in gods.  BTW, I also am an agnostic.  And no, this term is not some fence-sitting position between atheist and theist.  And agnostic either recognizes that one simple does not know, or that they cannot know,  whether gods exist.  I’m an agnostic-atheist, one who doesn’t know but does not currently believe in any gods.

If you, for any set of reasons, do not currently hold an active belief in any gods, then  you are an atheist too.  (Yes, that means that in any time of your life that you, for whatever reason, didn’t believe in god even for a little while, that made you an atheist).  I have a feeling there are a lot more of you atheists out there, but are too ignorant or to afraid to admit it, which leaves all of us out-of-the-closet atheists an easy target for discrimination from the people around you whom you are afraid to admit the same lack of belief to.  Cowards.

I’m also polyamorous.  No, that does not make me some fundamentalist atheist polygamist.  It means that I live a life of non-monogamy.  For all of you out there that are living happy, monogamous lives and tell your wife/husband/boyfriend/girlfriend/life-partner that they are the only one for you, well that’s just fine and dandy.  But excuse me for pointing out the observation that this romanticized ideal of some Disney-esque bullshit about prince charming or princess if-you-look-at-another-woman-I’ll-kill-you is probably the result of you repressing a large part of your sexuality in order to convince yourself that this one person is everything you will ever need sexually for the rest of your life.

Polyamory is about more than sex, however. It is a recognition that we do indeed already have complex and important relationships with more than one person, and often this can include sexuality. It is about honesty, openness, and sharing both ourselves and our loved ones. One thing is for sure; it is a crash course in being good at relationships, which means a crash course in honesty (with yourself and with others).

Jealousy and insecurity will continue to help people believe in god and monogamy so long as we go on not challenging people.  And for all of you that will comment that we shold not criticize, but rather allow others to live their lives as they want to, well allow me to preemptively point out that such a comment would be criticism (hypocrisy, much?).  And that will be the tone of this blog.


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